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[19 Jun 2010|07:04pm] |
I went to a new hairdresser today and she tried really hard to give me a mom haircut. She made turning it down really awkward too. She said "If you trust me, I'd like to try this." No, bitch. I don't trust you. All I wanted was a trim. By the way? The style she suggested was kind of like THIS but uglier and shorter. She told me my hair was 'too long for summer'.
I hate when you go in knowing what you want and the person with the scissors messes with you. Anyway, I'm dramatic. I'll stop.
There is nothing new in web, which is good news. Most of us remember when all of our secrets were revealed with a glitch. I'm sure everyone has been more careful since then. I've put the fear in your hearts. For those of you who weren't there, it was really, really dramatic. I think it simultaneously caused everyone in the office to argue. Thankfully, my hidden stuff was mostly just perverted, and everyone already knows that I think about sex more than anything else.
And, that's all now.
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[10 Mar 2010|06:56pm] |
I had a dream last night that Dan cheated on me with someone really, really ugly who worked at Spent. Mind you, I never actually saw her, but everyone else here seemed to know who she was and every time I mentioned her name, people winced and looked nauseous. I would say that this could be telling the future, but ugly people haven't worked here for a long time. When they do, they never last. Probably because you're all assholes and insult them. That's just a guess, though.
Has anyone else had any dreams that took place at Spent?
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[19 Jan 2010|01:45pm] |
I took the subway today to meet a friend for lunch, and some young guy standing behind me bumped into me when we came to a stop, and he definitely took advantage of the situation. Meaning, his hand ended up on my ass, and he quickly squeezed it. Knee-jerk reaction? Maybe. He then proceeded to attempt to relay the story to his two buddies without using words. I guess he thought that I wouldn't notice all of this going on. He was very proud of himself.
Don't worry, one of his friends rushed to my defense and called him a 'fag'. Only after I turned around to glare, though. Very classy people.
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[30 Dec 2009|10:43pm] |
What is everyone doing for New Years? I want to party like Ke$ha. You know. Brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack. Everybody gettin' crunk, crunk. Boys wanna touch my junk, junk. Something about the po-po. I don't know. Back to the point:
Is there a super cool New Years party I can crash? Because I promise that I'm a lot of fun.
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[06 Dec 2009|10:57pm] |
I had the worst night tonight. I was a clumsy idiot throughout the entire evening. I'm seriously shocked that I'm still alive to update this right now. This is why I should never leave my computer chair.
Anyway, I have a big cut on my finger from chopping vegetables. Dan's the cook, not me. Actually, I'm pretty much the worst wife that anyone could ask for as far as stereotypes go, but at least I'm really good in bed. That's right, people. I'm awesome in bed. Tell your friends. I'm pretty sure that's the second time I've put that in a post. I'm shameless.
To change the topic completely, I have to go Christmas shopping soon and I'm dreading it because I'm a cheap ass. I wish everyone had a $25 limit like the Secret Santa. I always resist the urge to cry when I get my credit card statement after my holiday shopping. It's a really serious issue for me. I think the rich people in this office should donate money to me so I can get through the season. Think about it, people.
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[14 Nov 2009|10:19pm] |
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This is cute. Still, I liked Aladdin best when he was a street rat. It made him dangerous.
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[10 Nov 2009|11:30am] |
Okay. So I just heard "For Your Entertainment" by Adam Lambert on the radio, and it's basically a song about rough, controlling sex. I sat there thinking it was really awkward until I looked it up and realized he's gay. It's funny how differently I perceive sex depending on the genders involved. I mean, a lot of women wouldn't want a man to tell them how they're going to hold them down and 'make them hurt real good'. I'm sure some gay men wouldn't want to here HEAR that either, but it's a more socially acceptable concept. It all depends on the audience, I guess.
I thought you all needed to know my thought process. The song is hilarious, by the way. I recommend you all run off and listen to it.
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[19 Oct 2009|12:48am] |
Okay, so I got MySpace a while ago because I'm a complete computer nerd. Don't act like you're surprised.
Anyway, I haven't checked it in ages, but tonight I logged in to look at my inbox. Guess what? I have a bunch of really pervy messages from all of these creepers. I'm going through all of them and laughing like crazy. One guy pretty much cybered himself in his message to me. I feel so violated.
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[06 Oct 2009|01:21pm] |
I stayed up really late last night playing video games, and now I'm paying for it. How immature am I? Seriously. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever grow up. And yes, I'm aware that this is a bad thing to post where my superiors can read. I'm hoping I'm too cute to fire.
If anyone wants to deliver food and coffee to my office, it would be much appreciated. Editors, if you want to goof off and avoid work, today is your day. I'm probably going to put sunglasses on and lean back in my chair to rest my eyes. Please don't draw on my face.
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[20 Sep 2009|08:51pm] |
So, I got married recently. It was a really small wedding with only a few people. Somehow, my ex found out, and she emailed me the other day to congratulate me and tell me how amazing her life is lately. I find this funny for three reasons. 1) We had a terrible break up, and although things have obviously cooled down, we don't exactly talk. I don't know why she felt the need to pat me on the back and tell me good job. 2) I didn't ask how her life was going, so it seems like she's just lying to herself. 3) I'm pretty sure she was drunk typing the email.
I'm so unsympathetic, but I don't even care. She's apparently dating someone else now, and I feel terrible for that poor woman. Rachel is one of those hot people who seems like the perfect package when you first get into the relationship, and then turns ungodly insane once you're hooked into something serious. Needless to say, I don't miss her. Her email did nothing but remind me of that fact.
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[20 Aug 2009|09:26pm] |
Guys. I'm getting married this weekend. And my fiancé is being the least romantic person alive and it's making me really angry. Someone isn't getting any after the wedding. Fuck him. Not literally, though. Yeah, stop typing, Madison. I feel as though I should be getting a lap dance from a nasty stripper right now.
What am I doing instead? Playing computer games, of course. I've always been a nerd, but now I'm a nerd that behaves herself. I'm throwing all sex appeal out the window. Let's wave goodbye to it.
In other news, I've recently hired new web assistants. Be nice to them, Spent. I kind of want them to stick around so I don't have to bust my ass all of the time. It's really hard being me.
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[05 Aug 2009|10:03pm] |
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For some reason, I sincerely doubt that women helped create THIS product. Three guesses why?
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[01 Aug 2009|11:32am] |
I got rid of the ugly sore on my eye, guys. I'm safe to look at again. One of my bffs left the office and I'm kind of depressed about it, though, so I'm not at 100%. Ahaha. I'm writing all of this like everyone needs a status update about me. I know that none of you actually care. PRETEND OTHERWISE.
The next couple of weeks are going to be really busy for me and the web department really isn't at full strength right now. I might need to bring in some temps until we hire new people. Then again, when the web department is at full strength, we seem to have huge problems. I don't know which is better: working all of the time to make up for the lack of employees, or working less and worrying about errors.
Anyway, it's August 1st, which means that summer is on its way out. I don't like this. It feels like I haven't enjoyed it much at all.
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[11 Jul 2009|04:37pm] |
So, I have a stye on my lower, right eyelid. It's on the inside, but my eye looks swelled and red. It's so, so gross. If you see me on Monday and you wish to comment, feel free to make a really sarcastic joke about how hot I am. I've decided to be positive about my unfortunate circumstances, and I'm willing to laugh at myself. It's not that big of a deal, but it hurts and UGH. I'm such a baby, but whatever.
This is why makeup is evil, girls. EVIL.
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[23 Jun 2009|12:40pm] |
I'm a bad friend. I'm extremely jealous of Jane, who is spending the week in sunny Florida. She and Connor are probably chilling on the beach right now just laughing at the rest of us. Not to mention, Floria is the senior capital of America, so they're definitely the youngest, hottest people around.
In other news, my laptop is getting kind of outdated at this point, and I'm looking into buying a new one. I'm a complete cheap ass, but I'll spend a bunch of money on electronics. I guess everyone has a 'thing', don't they?
I just have to make sure I don't go too far. I don't want Dan to become my sugar daddy. He might get sick of me and kick me out, and I'll be forced to move in with Nathan and sex him up for food and shelter. Apparently that's just how the Miller residence works.
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[24 May 2009|10:58pm] |
Okay, so I actually had a lot of fun on the retreat. The alcohol helped, of course, but I didn't mind the activities during the day either. Even with all of the washroom mix ups and the irritating counselors.
I must say, though, that it's nice to be in my own bed. I hate camp beds, and I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but when I sleep in a bunk, I have this irrational fear that the person above me is going to fall through the frame and land on me. That serves me right for picking the bottom bunk. I'm an idiot.
Anyway, I loved my cabin mates because they were some of the most agreeable people in the office. Go Cabin 7! I guess I'm on Richard's good side this year.
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[25 Apr 2009|07:50pm] |
Guys, I have to update and I've got nothing. I was going to do what Mer did and get a friend of mine to update about my tits, but eh. My friends tend to do that sort of thing in their own updates. And everything already knows how amazing my chest is. It would be kind of pointless to state the obvious.
I'm so excited for the retreat this year. I know everyone is already talking about it, but whatever. I'm adding to it. I expected a lot of awkward fights at last year's gig, but it actually turned out being a pretty good weekend. Well, if you made the best of it. It's awkward being ordered around by camp kids, but you know. It pays to find the humor in these types of situations.
I've gone bikini shopping already in preparation for the summer. It's expensive if you're like me and enjoy having more than one suit. It's amazing how much they can charge for two little pieces of fabric, really. Especially if you want the ones that don't feel as though they're going to rip. That's always a plus.
Okay. I'm off to play WoW like the huge loser I am.
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[20 Mar 2009|03:36am] |
I suck at updating this. Allow me to attempt to think of something interesting to put down.
... Yeah. I've got nothing. But! I found a wedding dress! If you've known me for longer than a few years, you're probably thinking "Weren't you supposed to get married forever ago? Major fail, Madison." Yeah, well. I suck and life is kind of busy. Clearly, Dan and I are one of those annoying couples that are engaged for way too long. I'm choosing not to be ashamed.
Web is really empty lately, which means lots of extra work for me. What the hell, people? Am I that bad of a boss? I must be. I'm putting a lot of pressure on Russ, I'll tell you. At least now that Jamie's gone there's no one around to encourage people to slack off. He's the only one that has stuck with me for this long. Kaitlyn and Andre? Don't you dare leave us.
And... I'd like to close this post with a mention of Anjuli, and how sad I am that she's not around this year to update about the upcoming spring. Click here for reference. And who could forget Ellie's excellent version: here. I miss Anjuli so much.
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[22 Feb 2009|12:12pm] |
I have a crazy crush on Eliza Dushku, and lately she's suddenly half-naked in everything. This makes me really happy. I love to hate Maxim, but I might buy it for her shoot. Yes. I'm that hypocritical. The girl isn't even my usual type. It must be the doe eyes that get me. And, uh, the body.
In other less random news, the weather today disappoints me. I should have gotten out yesterday to go for a walk, but I was too lazy to get off my ass and pushed it forward to today. Bad idea. I'm not so into being active that I will suffer the half rain/half snow combinations. Besides, with my rabbit diet lately, I couldn't gain weight if I tried. Which is a good thing, I guess. When my weight fluctuates to the point of me not being able to fit into my regular clothes, I get very panicky cranky. I hate buying temporary 'fat weight' clothes. Or whatever you want to call them.
Well, this was pointless. I'm going back to illegally downloading movies now.
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